The 5 Types of Brides You Will Encounter This Wedding Season
Yes, millennials, the struggle is real. You don’t need another meme to remind you—all of your friends are getting married and having kids. Whether you are on the outside looking in or the inside looking out (uh-oh), there is no escaping this new stage in life.
You will soon realize that nearly every bride fits into one of these 5 categories. Wedding season is on the horizon; good luck identifying the engaged extremists in your life:
1. Bridezilla
Does she even need an introduction? We have all encountered the classic, terrifying Bridezilla during our journey into adulthood. She is notorious for temper tantrums, pet-peeves, meltdowns, and her unrealistically large, 3-ring binder, where her big day is scheduled down to the millisecond.
She doesn’t care how expensive her bridesmaid dresses are. Too pricey? Go home! Victims—I mean, bridesmaids—take the brunt of all battles: brave, brave ladies.
2. The Obsessed Bride
Similar to Bridezilla, the Obsessed Bride is the less-childish version. She also plans everything in a large binder, but her bridesmaids do not feel like they are constantly babysitting a whiny toddler post bedtime.
Beware: she chooses innocent prey anywhere and everywhere. Sitting next to her as the Metro slowly trudges through the city? Be prepared to learn all of the details—her wedding colors, the number of bridesmaids and junior bridesmaids accompanying her at the altar, her future last name, and even her dress size. Prepare your eardrums; she doesn’t understand the concept of TMI.
3. The One in Denial
The polar opposite to the aforementioned brides, the One in Denial has no idea she is even getting married. When she does finally realize, she has no idea how quickly the date is approaching.
She is late on deadlines, she doesn’t know how many guests have RSVP’d, and she has yet to find a caterer that is willing to work with her procrastination (think contracts, people). She isn’t ready to give up her maiden name yet and, worst of all, the wedding is 2 weeks away and she has yet to order a wedding dress. Just 2 weeks already? No, no, that can’t be right!
4. The Free-Spirited Bride
The Free-Spirited Bride is almost too laid back. She, unlike her counterparts, allows—almost forces—her fiancé to do a lot of the planning. Nothing like your traditional bride, she is flexible enough to go with the flow. This bride isn’t afraid to wear a short, vintage dress from the 1950’s or to rock a flower halo in lieu of a veil. Table centerpieces don’t prove her love; if she forgets to order them, she won’t freak out about it. And matching bridesmaid dresses? That is so 2008 (not that she cares).
5. The Cheapo
She accepts help from anyone that wants to contribute anything. You’ve got an old Christmas wreath laying around? She’ll find a use for it. Her friend’s mom owns a bakery? Yep, she hinted at the hookup. Who needs wedding favors? Don’t most people forget to take them once they’ve had enough sangria, anyway?
Frugal enough to rationalize that a wedding ring is an unnecessary expense (engagement rings get the point across), she finds a way to cut corners everywhere. Sure, settling for catering from the rundown Chinese place down the street is not her best idea, but you can’t convince her otherwise. I mean, they accept competitor’s coupons!
Determine What Matters
No matter where you, your sister, your best friend, your coworker, or your future step-grandmother fit in, it is important to remember: a wedding often becomes a people-pleasing event in disguise. Ultimately, only two people matter—you and your fiancé (OK, and your mothers—there is no escaping that one). You will be just fine once you step foot on the aisle runner and see that handsome face gazing at you.