7 Struggles You’ll Only Know If You Have An Insatiable Appetite

Bridget Jones's Diary / Amazon.com
Bridget Jones’s Diary / Amazon.com

1. Going to parties isn’t easy.

Basically, if you are attending any kind of party or social event, all of these questions run through your mind: Will there be food? Should I eat beforehand just in case there isn’t? Should I bring some food? What if there isn’t any food and I don’t bring my own food and I die of starvation?? Is there some kind of store close to the location of the party that has food?

2. Class isn’t so easy either.

Yeah, so that horrendous noise you just heard? That was my stomach. I literally just ate ON THE WAY TO CLASS but, true to form, my stomach still growls just at the thought that I might have forgotten to bring a snack with me to class. But then, who are you kidding? Of course you have a snack with you. You knew that this would happen and you are the kind of person who knows how to prepare. You reach into your purse or backpack and you find what you’ve been searching for…oh sweet heavens there’s the crackers! You’re concerned about making too much noise, but obviously not too concerned to stop eating.

3. Same goes for waking up in the morning.

You know when you wake up in the morning and you are starving? Your first thought seems to be “Did I just run a marathon in my sleep?” Or “No… I definitely slept for a week solid and missed all of my meals.” Because that’s the only way I could possibly be this hungry. Then you check your phone and reality slaps you in the face… it has only been seven hours. Midnight snacks are worthless.

4. Seeing your friends with food is always a challenge.

You just ate. You meet up with your friend who didn’t have time to get lunch so she grabs a burger. You think, “Why am I staring at her hamburger with so much food lust in my eyes? I can’t be hungry. Nope, definitely not hungry. But still: Why is she eating in front of me? Does she hate me?” You sip so fiercely on your bottle of water your friend thinks you might be dehydrated. Her food smells so good you can’t help it. Finally, you can’t fight it any longer. “Are you going to finish that?” you ask, desperately.

5. The hunger after the hunger.

Which is all the time. Hunger cares not where you are, or what you have eaten, especially if it was a four-course meal. You know that as soon as you “finish eating,” you’ll be more than ready for whatever comes next. Someone’s leftovers? You’ll take it! Dessert? Do you even have to ask?

6. You don’t even know what it feels like to skip a meal or a snack.

You’re trying out this new gym thing with your friend, but as soon as you get there you can’t seem to squash the thought: “God I’m starving. How much longer is this going to last? I can’t skip my snack time. I can’t skip my lunchtime! Have I been here for four hours?” *Looks at clock. Realizes 7 minutes have passed by.* And THAT’S why you’ve got your trusty snacks with you. Does it matter that everyone looks at your like you’re a little crazy while you’re eating a chocolate bar in downward dog? Nope, not at all.

7. The hanger; or the food hangover.

HOLY HUNGER OF ALL HUNGER! You haven’t had anything to eat in a little while, and it hits you, completely out of nowhere. You start to shake. Everything is getting on your nerves. You think, “Why are these people talking to me? Can’t they see how hungry I am? Don’t they know that if they don’t bring me food now they should just leave me the hell alone?” Then, the classic: “I’m so hungry I could eat everything and anything and also I might kill someone if I don’t get my hands on some kind of food right now!” Followed by blacking out and waking up, lying in what could only be described as some kind of food bomb, with not a clue as to what just happened. TC mark

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