Because they don’t want you to grow.
Failure. Success. These are absolutes that exist on opposite sides of a ruthless spectrum, and I’m going to tell you a secret I’ve learned from spending time with people who have both failed and succeeded in extreme ways: both feel exactly the same.
“You’re not like other girls. You’re so smart and strong. You’ve accomplished so much. I can actually have a conversation with you!”
When you’re gaslit for so long, so hard, your ability to tell what’s real and what’s not, breaks.