Just because I don’t need you to help me carry file boxes at work doesn’t mean that I’m the ungrateful female in the office that you can gossip about with your guys over lunch. I don’t have to order a drink at a client meeting to prove “I can hang” with my other male associates. And don’t assume that my Fantasy Baseball team is too good for me to have drafted alone without the self-righteous wisdom of another make counterpart.
Newsflash: I already know you think I’m a bitch, and I know you know I don’t care much about what you call me. But lately, there has been a specific underlying notion that gets my gears grinding.
Now really, is it because I’m the honest opinion you’re listening to in client briefs? Or just maybe is it that you don’t like seeing the potential of a successful woman you wouldn’t want as your boss…?
Annnnnd, I think I’ve struck a chord.
For some background: it’s 2014 and this is what women in my age range have said themselves over dinner and drinks to me —
“He thinks I’m a selfish because I wanted to buy a new car in celebration of my huge promotion…..am I ridiculous for believing that…?”
“My boss thinks I need a break from my client because there might be, ‘sexual tension’ – he actually thinks my success with my client has to do with seducing him! What a fucking jerk, right?”
“I’ve been SLAVING over this presentation to get this promotion for work, and you know what they’d rather do? They’d rather hire an inexperienced new graduate to ‘share’ the workload and give us both the same salary. Did I mention this resulted in me actually getting a pay cut? My 27 year-old self is sharing the same salary as some inexperienced 21 year-old! I’m more than angry, I’m pissed off!”
It’s fascinating how a teeny bit of success can make a man weak at the knees. Better yet, make them absolutely scared shitless.
I’m a young professional in my early 20s and I’ve been perceived as many names in a few industries all ready — some words in which I’m not really sure what they mean. But I can assure you that my willingness to topple this misogynist salary driven society is at an all time high — and I wasn’t taught to be passive about getting what I want.
I grew up in a household where my parents taught me the basics about living life — don’t take shit from anyone, do not get discouraged and “rub some dirt on it.” For those who don’t get that saying, just go Google it.
My father always used to say: “As soon as you allow yourself to hear the negative, you become the negative.”
For the brief stint in working in the MLB, I finally knew what my father meant after all these years. Men that were 20 years my senior were actually treating me differently because… what? My age? Rather being the only woman in my department, it was my status in knowledge and can-do attitude that made them scared for their own jobs.
I was sent to do petty work in many sectors, but was never awarded appropriately like some other men in the same line of work. It was apparent that by giving me more busy work, I wouldn’t be given the opportunity to blossom as a professional equal. It was clear — these men were legitimately threatened by me and were doing anything to stunt my potential for success in a male-dominated world.
So just like that, I said farewell to the male-driven industry and embraced my new goal in life – to be that main bitch every man fears and every girl dreams to be.
So here I am today, 24 years-old and working at a respected agency, named after the educated and no-bullshit women that started it. These women surrounding me have the unmistakable knowledge and the valuable experience in being a female in a male dominated industry. These women are the real deal Grade-A-Bitches that many women and men respect now after many years of nail scratching and hard work. These are the pioneer women that so many young women like me to aspire to be — to be that very “Bitch” that no one can take down.
So the next time you give attitude to that surly new girl at your office that challenges your work or choose to ignore that smart driven young female intern with the bright ambitious (and scary good) ideas, just remember this — she’s that someone who doesn’t care what you think. She ultimately wants to be successful in life and as far as she’s concerned, you’re not going to stop her.
She wants you to call her a bitch, cause that ultimately means you fear her.
And baby, that’s the fuel that gets her awake every morning.