Our Pledge To The Servers Of America

We thank you for dealing with our irrational demands. We thank you for refilling our cups of water five times before our meal even arrives. We thank you for your patience. We, the customers, pledge to all the servers of America…

We will not complicate a $2.50 drink. We will not ask for precisely three cherries in our Shirley Temples. We will not ask for our freshly squeezed orange juice at meal time to come in a glass cup, and we will most definitely not ask you to make any half-and-half combinations (these include diet and regular, sweetened and unsweetened, and so on).

We will not treat the restaurant like a Burger King. We will respect the chef and take the dishes as they come, perhaps only making minor modifications. We will not ask you to add lettuce, tomatoes, and onions to the crab ravioli. We will not take the meatiest thing on the menu and ask you to make it vegetarian, because like, you can and stuff.

We will not take advantage of your free bread. Gosh, it is delicious, but we will not ask you to bring five baskets of free bread and then order one entrée to share. We will not, throughout the meal, ask you to bring us more bread, and even box some up for our hungry dogs at home.

We will not call you “You,” “Server,” or “Excuse Me.” We will respect your parents’ wishes and call you the name they have chosen for you. We will not call you “WAITRESS!” or even “Excuse Me.” We will not call you that, especially if you are at another table tending to other customers. We will not pretend that, in this restaurant, the world revolves around us.

We will not treat this wonderful place like a pigsty. We will try our hardest to treat this like our home, and we will try to not spill sauce on the floor. We will try to not drop our silverware, and we promise that if we do drop it, we will pick it up. We will show you that our mothers raised us well.

We will honor your service and be grateful. Our gratuity will not be less than 18% if you have been attentive, dealt with our screaming children, and refilled our half tea, half diet Pepsi, splash of grenadine five times. We will appreciate the fact that, despite the seven other tables you’re serving, you have checked on us and did not let us go thirsty or hungry.

We will realize you are a human being. Despite the fact that we are paying for the service, we will remember that you are a human being who makes mistakes and has bad days. We will not treat you like a second-class citizen, and if your service is not a 10, but rather a 6, we will not contact the manager numerous times to complain about you. We will not purposefully try to make you upset, and most importantly…

WE PLEDGE TO ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT, EVEN IF WE WANT TO BE RIGHT, SOMETIMES WE ARE WRONG. TC mark

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  • http://www.facebook.com/t.jason.ham Jason Ham

    Agustina, tell us how you REALLY feel, lol.

    I’ve never worked as a server, but people who are rude to servers shock
    me. This article as the most annoying tone though. #actuallyvomiting

  • Sophia

    I have only two words for this: thank you.

  • Anon

    thank yooouuuuu. i’ve been a server since I was 16. 

  • http://www.TechComet.com abhiroopb

    What if the waiter/waitress is turned away from you and you cannot see their name? How should you get their attention?

    • SippyCup

       Assume their name is Richard and call out dick.

      • Really??

        Uncalled for.

      • Reallyreally??

        attitude check prease. Sippy was joking.

    • Molly

      Server’s almost ALWAYS tell you their names when they come to your table to get your drinks.

      Obviously, it’s not always easy to remember someone’s name but it’s not hard to ask, either.

  • Mmmk

    I agree with everything but the gratuity. I apologize, but tipping is not a mandatory sum of money– it began and always should remain a reflection of service. That said, if the service is good, 15-20% is certainly called for. If the service is excellent, 20-25%. If the server is snobby, disrespectful, or exceptionally slow, I’mma go ahead and give a nickel. See how that works?

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1363230138 Michael Koh
      • Mmmk

        And your point? All of those things are under the job description. Do I get tipped for my styling services in the clothing boutique I work in? Though I steam all of the dresses, offer advice on what may look best, provide individual attention to all customers, deal with sweat stains, straighten racks, and do my job, I do not expect tip– unless I really go above and beyond. Even if I do, no tip. Not a big deal. If a barista or server would like a tip, I would like them to treat me well. Just like my cappuccino, that is not a tall order.

      • Stefan

        Are you (legally) paid less than minimum wage?

      • Mary

        We should change that. EVERYONE should be paid minimum wage, and do away with the concept of tipping altogether. I never understood how you can get the same service at a fancy restaurant as at a diner but the server will get a bigger tip simply because the food costs more. Just do away with tipping, and pay everyone a wage they deserve. (Don’t get me wrong, I tip well, just hate the game.)

      • MMMK

        amen.

      • Stefan

        Exactly. It may be a flawed system, but as long as it remains that  way I’ll try to do my part to help out. That’s all I meant.

      • Guesty

        A lot of waitstaff will be pissed when you try to bump them down to no tips, just minimum wage.  

      • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1363230138 Michael Koh

        Look at the comments dipshit.

      • MMMK

        point taken ;)

    • Ali

      You can always tell when someone has never worked in the industry when they consider a “15%” tip worthy of anything. If you tip less than 20%, you are an asshole. That server has bills to pay just like you, and I’m guessing you don’t make 3 bucks an hour. Put the extra couple bucks down, they probably need it more than you.

      • MMMK

        For the record, I generally do tip 20%, because generally the server is just lovely and we have witty rapport. If the server is a douche, they get nothing from me. I consider myself an easy customer, I’m not Meg Ryan from When Harry Met Sally. Don’t demonize people who tip when and where it is deserved. Jesu Christe. *rolls eyes*

      • Ali

        Three. Dollars. An. Hour.

      • MMMK

        problem with the system, NOT ME. (also for the record, I only work on commission. I earn by what I sell- not that it’s your business)

      • Ali

        True, holmes. Fux dat system, I ain’t gunna give mah monies to no mean server! No matter dat sum bitches juss walked out onna 100 dolla tab. She (or he!) ain’t got no damn rights to be in a bad mood. Cuz sur as shiteee I ain’t evar in no bad mood at work! But dayummm I has a realz job (that ain’t my business) and I alwayzzz happa!

        That’s all I’ve got.

      • MMMK

        bless your heart that was just adorable. I’d invite you to brunch, but then you might actually see that I’m not one of the people you’re fighting against. ta ta. #overit

      • Ali

        Ah, the wonders of the interwebs and never picking up on sarcasm. Do you know how long it took me to type that out? IT WAS HARD AND MADE JUST FOR YOU.

        (For the record, I have no qualm with you, if you have particularly bad service, you don’t have to tip, I generally do, in hopes that they will begin to have a better day, and because I know what horrible days feel like. The only thing I ever had a problem with was when people still think that 15% is a good tip. It hasn’t been since the 90s.)

      • MMMK

        I would say I agree with that. I mean, it’s frustrating when I’m expected to tip exaggeratedly well for every mediocre server. I definitely understand bad days– and bad clients. sometimes people come into the store and act like total hellhounds and I literally want to hit them, but in order to make any money at all, I have to act like I don’t mind being used and abused for three hours in order to get paid (awk wording). I try never to be that patron when I’m at a restaurant. I have no qualms with giving adaquate servers a 20%, unless my bank account is particularly low. (which, lets be honest, the fourth mimosa is unnecessary if I’m low on da ca$h. 

        I think we’re reasonable people who got into an unreasonable (yet satisfying) argument. 

        That said, brunch? :P I ain’t gon’ do no brayunch wit some1 who don’ lyke me nonez, but I lykes yo’ sens o’ humah.

        My life:

      • Ali

        Frainz?

      • Ali

        (and by this I mean “friends”)

        (and I am providing nothing worthwhile to TC)

        (it feels liberating)

      • MMMK

        yes prease. exchange youtubes? or maybe za tumblrz? perhaps de mail? 

      • MMMK

        yes prease. exchange youtubes? or maybe za tumblrz? perhaps de mail? 

      • Anti-Climacus

        The system might not be your problem, but being an asshole is. 

      • G.

        Just be happy you don’t work in the f’n kitchen.

      • Ali

        I do work in the f’n kitchen. I like it a whole fucking lot better there too. Fire and knives is all I need. Customer service is not my strong suit.

      • Guesty

        Not in Washington, Oregon, California, Minnesota, Montana and Nevada, where servers make minimum plus tips.  15% is fucking fine where I live.  

  • ks

    …nothing wrong w/asking for a half iced tea half lemonade….

  • ks

    …nothing wrong w/asking for a half iced tea half lemonade….

  • Sofia

    Rolling my eyes at the “at least!!!!11” 18% tip. 

    Tips are usually calculated at being 15% BEFORE taxes and that’s if the service has been good. Diners are not social workers and yes, I have been a waitress before. When I got tipped 15% I did not complain because the problem isn’t with the customers being stingy etc. but with the system itself having servers paid under the minimum wage hourly.

  • Ashen1

    The place where I work has awful patrons. I’m not sure if it’s like this at every buffet place but I usually make 12% in a day. I get people their drinks, I take away all their plates, I clean the table after they’re gone and I do standard waiter side jobs like vacuuming at the end of the day. However there are always people who don’t tip at all. Thank god I do this part time because it is absolutely soul agonizing. I do better on tips than the other waiters probably because I haven’t been sucked dry from having this be my lifelong job. I provide good service and it does make me giddy when someone leaves me 50% but that just covers those assholes who didn’t tip at all. So if you think tipping 20% is too high, well I think so too, just give me 15% and I am perfectly happy, just keep in mind that some people tip 0% and will always tip that way. Being a waiter isn’t easy and I think most people would think differently about tipping if they had to do this for just a week. (When I work, the hours are usually from 11am-10pm)

    • Ashen1

      Oh yeh, I would advise against not tipping if you like going to a certain restaurant. I treat tippers and non-tippers equally but the other waiters where I work do not. We do talk. You might get something unpleasant in your food.

  • shelly

    THANK YOU, YOU ARE A GOD-SENT ANGEL.

  • Msfw

    I wish I could hang this article at the front of the hair salon I work at (I understand it’s a different job, but the same rules apply). People really do expect more out of you than you can do, and it’s extremely frustrating having clients that want something that I absolutely cannot do for them. Nice article – I wish everyone in the world had to read this.

  • Strange Friend

    Thanks for not writing in the third-person in your bio.

  • Anonymous

    ta.gg/55j

  • Anti-Climacus

    And don’t forget that a delivery driver is like a waiter too! A waiter that has to worry about being robbed at gunpoint or being killed by a drunk driver!

  • untimelymeds

    I don’t see what’s wrong with saying “excuse me” to get your attention. Isn’t that more polite than simply screaming whatever it is I want?  Sure, you have a name, but I probably won’t see you ever again, and to be completely honest, I couldn’t really care what it is.   Just there to eat and to enjoy the company I’m with.  Not there to be a samaritan or best friends with my server. 

  • untimelymeds

    I don’t see what’s wrong with saying “excuse me” to get your attention. Isn’t that more polite than simply screaming whatever it is I want?  Sure, you have a name, but I probably won’t see you ever again, and to be completely honest, I couldn’t really care what it is.   Just there to eat and to enjoy the company I’m with.  Not there to be a samaritan or best friends with my server. 

    • http://twitter.com/vickstahs Vicky Nguyen

      Precisely. I wouldn’t want a customer I was serving to address me by my name, either. It’s weird, unnatural and not at all necessary. “Excuse Me” is more than happy to serve you, you polite things.

  • HeyYou

    I started working as a server in college and definitely tip better now as a result. 
    You truly see a very negative side to people and families at times! Food smeared; stomped… the table a complete mess, and certainly some infantile demands. And the number of people that are just straight-up rude is shocking. $2.13 / hr plus tips on a five hour shift! It’s a decent job though– very demanding, however. 

  • HeyYou

    I started working as a server in college and definitely tip better now as a result. 
    You truly see a very negative side to people and families at times! Food smeared; stomped… the table a complete mess, and certainly some infantile demands. And the number of people that are just straight-up rude is shocking. $2.13 / hr plus tips on a five hour shift! It’s a decent job though– very demanding, however. 

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacob-Marek/696640989 Jacob Marek

    as a part-time server myself, it bugs me to no end when servers EXPECT to get a decent tip for providing the bare minimum.  paying customers are entitled to exactly what they pay for: good service, good food, and a pleasant experience. if ordering 5 specialty drinks “just-so” is what makes the experience good for you, that’s my job.  does it get annoying, especially when i’m “in the weeds”? of course. but it’s my job, and i’m there to ensure you leave satisfied.

    there’s no need to apologize for a complicated order. i just ask for respect from my guests, as one would expect in a civil society.  if you need to get my attention, calling my name or a polite “excuse me” is absolutely in order.  if you see i have 7 demanding tables at 8pm on a saturday, please understand that it may take a couple of extra minutes, but i assure you i am doing my best.
    to the servers, flight attendants, and every other service industry worker that seems to feel it’s appropriate to bitch about your jobs: get over it.  nobody likes their job 100% of the time.  get on board, or get off the train!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacob-Marek/696640989 Jacob Marek

    as a part-time server myself, it bugs me to no end when servers EXPECT to get a decent tip for providing the bare minimum.  paying customers are entitled to exactly what they pay for: good service, good food, and a pleasant experience. if ordering 5 specialty drinks “just-so” is what makes the experience good for you, that’s my job.  does it get annoying, especially when i’m “in the weeds”? of course. but it’s my job, and i’m there to ensure you leave satisfied.

    there’s no need to apologize for a complicated order. i just ask for respect from my guests, as one would expect in a civil society.  if you need to get my attention, calling my name or a polite “excuse me” is absolutely in order.  if you see i have 7 demanding tables at 8pm on a saturday, please understand that it may take a couple of extra minutes, but i assure you i am doing my best.
    to the servers, flight attendants, and every other service industry worker that seems to feel it’s appropriate to bitch about your jobs: get over it.  nobody likes their job 100% of the time.  get on board, or get off the train!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacob-Marek/696640989 Jacob Marek

    as a part-time server myself, it bugs me to no end when servers EXPECT to get a decent tip for providing the bare minimum.  paying customers are entitled to exactly what they pay for: good service, good food, and a pleasant experience. if ordering 5 specialty drinks “just-so” is what makes the experience good for you, that’s my job.  does it get annoying, especially when i’m “in the weeds”? of course. but it’s my job, and i’m there to ensure you leave satisfied.

    there’s no need to apologize for a complicated order. i just ask for respect from my guests, as one would expect in a civil society.  if you need to get my attention, calling my name or a polite “excuse me” is absolutely in order.  if you see i have 7 demanding tables at 8pm on a saturday, please understand that it may take a couple of extra minutes, but i assure you i am doing my best.
    to the servers, flight attendants, and every other service industry worker that seems to feel it’s appropriate to bitch about your jobs: get over it.  nobody likes their job 100% of the time.  get on board, or get off the train!

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