18 True Thoughts Every Woman Has When Starting A Relationship

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1. “To pill or not to pill.”

2. “When is it ok to invade his bathroom with literally the entire likes of the personal care aisle at Target?”

3. “For the love of God do not scroll too far back in my Facebook photos. There’s a blatant awkward phase and I’m not sure if unconditional love is possible after that”

4. “Please understand that Netflix was my last and longest relationship and it takes time to open up to a physical being.”

5. *Inserts one too many kiss face emojis* “This is borderline preteen girl communication. I should do better.” 

6. “Decipher my passive aggression? No shit Sherlock, I’m a woman.”

7. “Tinder, it’s been entertaining. But only entertaining.” 

8. “Instagram official? Facebook official? Snapchat this love story? Stream live on Meerkat? To hell with this digital validation.“

9. “His tolerance to my time at Sephora is surely an accurate measure to how much he likes me.”

10. “Removing all makeup in his presence will, MUST, be a strategic gradual process. Only the Lord knows what I look like Monday morning and he has not yet reached divine status.”

11. “Cooking real food may win me some ultimate gf points but take out pizza speaks to me on a spiritual level.” 

12. “What affectionate nickname will not come off as disgustingly cute in public?” 

13. “How do I tell him his go-to cuddling position is draining all my blood from my right arm. But I mean, it’s so cute he hugs me to sleep. How important is blood flow anyways?!?”

14. “Crying while neck deep through this Shailene Woodley movie will result in mascara madness. I repeat, you will semi resemble a Japanese horror movie extra. Too early for that, woman.”

15. *When you first miss him BAD* “I just want to hold him and hug him sooooooooo tight until we morph into one strange entity and then he can never leave” 

16. “I can’t believe we like the same *insert hipster band from the early 2000s*. HE MUST BE THE ONE. REPRODUCE RIGHT NOW. Jk, I need to like, get my shits together first.”

17. “He’s seen my entire rotation of bras and underwear twice. Time to hit up Victoria’s Secret to soak in inspiration (but actually proceed to the sale section of whatever lingerie store closest that does not charge $60 for a mechanism that hold your girls together).”

18. *Asks questions about his exes which provokes inquiries into your sudden curiosity*  “How else can I aggressively creep them? C’mon, it’s 2015. Google searches under Boolean context is a qualified endorsed skill in my LinkedIn.”