Thought Catalog
March 21, 2014

36 Things I Wish I Figured Out Sooner

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  • Fluff rice with a fork, never stir it with a spoon.
  • Vaseline is the best night time eye cream on the market.
  • You can buy alcohol and chips with your parents’ gas station credit cards.
  • If you force something, you’ll break it. That could be good or bad.
  • It’s important to read the care tags on your clothing and follow those instructions.
  • Related: don’t wash and dry j. crew wool sweaters.
  • Changing your car’s oil is not optional.
  • Whatever physical objects you acquire you will one day have to put into a box and move.
  • You’re allowed to disagree with negative feedback.
  • It’s always worth reading the instruction manual.
  • Nostalgia, like any drug, can be a poison or a remedy.
  • Pets are like human friends but better in every conceivable way.
  • Good doctors listen more than they talk.
  • You can’t fix a burned roux.
  • Floss.
  • Just because someone is an authority figure does not mean they are intelligent/competent/right.
  • Measure twice, cut once.
  • Get your nice jeans and dress pants tailored by a professional.
  • If you’re uncomfortable wearing it you will not look good.
  • You’re not required to drink alcohol while in a bar.
  • There are a few things that cure all ills: the beach, your favorite album on vinyl, and fresh garlic.
  • Kindness is not weakness.
  • Baking soda is not baking powder.
  • Taking Excedrin P.M. while still in public is not advisable.
  • Terrible people will succeed. Wonderful people will fail. The world is not fair.
  • Appropriate footwear is always key.
  • You can absolutely be too forgiving.
  • Real humor punches up, not down.
  • Reading the assigned chapters will actually help you learn the material.
  • There are no adults. Everyone is as clueless as you are.
  • Applying eyeliner well is a timeless art.
  • You can always leave. Awkward dates, suffocating jobs, hometowns that you outgrow, relationships that aren’t growing in the right direction.
  • You can always come home again.
  • But it won’t be the same.
  • Life is too short for bad books, boring movies, shitty people, and margarine.
  • Never underestimate the importance of eyebrows. TC Mark