Suggestions For The Trillion Dollar Coin, From A 21-Year-Old
Barack Obama is thinking about having a trillion dollar coin minted to save the economy from default. Since he is like 50 and has probably never illegally downloaded Photoshop, followed upcoming graphic-designers on Tumblr, or watched a documentary about typefaces on Netflix, I feel like it’s probably my duty as an American to lend my “uniquely creative mind” and give him a few suggestions.
There’s no need to pay me for these ones, Mr. President, I’m used to working for free or school credit. A simple follow on Twitter will suffice for my service to this country.
Suggestions For The Next Great American Trillion Dollar Coin
- Put Lena Dunham’s Face On The Front
- Make It Turquoise-Colored
- It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A Tupac Hologram
- Put Ke$ha’s Face On The Front
- Back Design = A Spotify Account Name And Password
- Carve “In Ryan Godling We Trust”
- Make It Triangle-Shaped
- Carve “In Grimes We Trust”
- Back Design = The Nickelodeon Logo From The 90s
- It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A Snapchat
- Make It Cat-Shaped
- Carve “In Alt Lit We Trust”
- It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A Discount At J. Crew
- Put Leslie Knope’s Face On The Front
- It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A 40 Of Miller High Life
- Carve “In Blue Ivy Carter We Trust”
- Put Tim Heidecker’s Face On The Front
- Back Design = Eric Wareheim
- Back Design = The Album Art For “In The Aeroplane Over The Sea”
- Make It An “Artisanal Coin”
- It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A Special Snowflake
- Carve “XOXO Gossip Girl”
- Put My Face On The Front
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We’d sincerely appreciate it if you all just retired already, we’ll take it from here. Grab your mops Millennials, we have a lot of work to do.
I often find myself in situations where I can’t stop drinking, and I wonder what and who I am becoming. Mom? Dad? Both? Neither?
The majority in Schuette represent the widespread belief that we live in a post-racial society and race based admissions reinforces and highlights racial divides.