January 12, 2013

Suggestions For The Trillion Dollar Coin, From A 21-Year-Old

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What is the issue?

Barack Obama is thinking about having a trillion dollar coin minted to save the economy from default. Since he is like 50 and has probably never illegally downloaded Photoshop, followed upcoming graphic-designers on Tumblr, or watched a documentary about typefaces on Netflix, I feel like it’s probably my duty as an American to lend my “uniquely creative mind” and give him a few suggestions.

There’s no need to pay me for these ones, Mr. President, I’m used to working for free or school credit. A simple follow on Twitter will suffice for my service to this country.

Shutterstock
Shutterstock

Suggestions For The Next Great American Trillion Dollar Coin

  • Put Lena Dunham’s Face On The Front
  • Make It Turquoise-Colored
  • It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A Tupac Hologram
  • Put Ke$ha’s Face On The Front
  • Back Design = A Spotify Account Name And Password
  • Carve “In Ryan Godling We Trust”
  • Make It Triangle-Shaped
  • Carve “In Grimes We Trust”
  • Back Design = The Nickelodeon Logo From The 90s
  • It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A Snapchat
  • Make It Cat-Shaped
  • Carve “In Alt Lit We Trust”
  • It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A Discount At J. Crew
  • Put Leslie Knope’s Face On The Front
  • It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A 40 Of Miller High Life
  • Carve “In Blue Ivy Carter We Trust”
  • Put Tim Heidecker’s Face On The Front
  • Back Design = Eric Wareheim
  • Back Design = The Album Art For “In The Aeroplane Over The Sea”
  • Make It An “Artisanal Coin”
  • It Shouldn’t Be A Coin It Should Be A Special Snowflake
  • Carve “XOXO Gossip Girl”
  • Put My Face On The Front TC mark
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