If I Took #YOLO Seriously
As of late I’ve had a plethora of my Facebook friends update their status along the lines of something similar to:
“Like OMG it’s Friday night! With all my [girlz/boyz] downtown getting crunk! Black out or back out! #YOLO”
And after I defriend them, I wonder to myself, is “YOLO” really about going downtown, taking pictures of yourself getting (or pretending to get) plastered, and blacking out in a pool of your own vomit in a public bathroom? Is life really about taking shots? Maybe they were thinking to themselves, “We’re totally YOLO-ing guys!” whenever Kimmy decides to go comatose and needs a helicopter EVAC to the hospital. Now, don’t get me wrong, who doesn’t like to party? But does this situation really deserve the honor of “You Only Live Once?” Apparently there’s a world full of “YOLO-ers” that have figured out life’s greatest moments, and my view of life seems to be a little shy of that.
Call me old-fashioned, but I never brag on Facebook. The whole thing just seems too… pretentious-asshole, attention-seeking, really-crying-inside. And as much as I love my friends, doing dumb things with them, and having a great time, it probably wouldn’t deserve a “YOLO.” YOLO’s implications should be much more positive. “You Only Live Once” conveys a message similar to that of the saying “I realize my life is temporary, and someday I will either ascend to the great beyond or simply cease to exist. I need to investigate as much of my own and the world’s potential in order to fulfill myself as a spiritual and physical entity of the universe.” And whether or not it may be true, you only live once. And while raging like a fiend may be a part of that, hopefully there’s more to life than tequila and regurgitated pizza.
If someone were to force me to update my Facebook status with the moments when I thought “YOLO” was a necessary hash tag, these would be included, at some point in my life:
- “I just married the only woman that would ever complete me. #YOLO”
- “Adopted a son. #YOLO”
- “Started donating 50 cents a day for homeless animals. #YOLO #sarahmclachlan”
- “I learned that money isn’t the answer, but family is. #YOLO”
- “I just made the best Bananas foster crêpes. #YOLO #pauladeen”
- “I just changed my name to Nickolai Zelovanokoff. Moving to Russia #YOLO #lovethosefurhats”
- “A man’s left testicle hangs lower than the right to account for the scissor motion of the legs. I love having the opportunity to go to college. #YOLO”
- “I came out to my parents and friends. I’m not ashamed to be gay. YOLO#” *
- “Just revived my old high school band, Karmel Karl and the Milk Man. #YOLO”
*Homosexuality not a personal preference but something I respect for others.
It started with a right swipe, a little green heart. Tinder of course.
Though I acknowledge and appreciate the differences in human experiences, and while your heartbreak is (and always will be) uniquely and completely your own, I must urge you to consider that I have been where you are.
By Devon Oyler
With his hat cocked back, body tilted away from his cane, and right forefinger pointing directly at his audience, Joseph Ducreux commands the attention of those viewing his self-portrait.
I was born in 1990; he was born in 1973. I’m 23; he just turned 40.