I know it’s scary, but it is in fact perfectly achievable. Think of me as your shepherdess leading you to the land of Milk and Honey, to The Field of Dreams. Heed my words, dream-weavers, and you’ll be on the fast-track to makin’ it with hot, faceless, one-night-stand discards like there’s no tomorrow.

So this week I read a (literal) sob-story on Huffington Post by a brave woman named Robin Korth who, at 59 years old, has just discovered that she’s not a 22 year old hot piece of ass.