Sonic wasn’t so edgy that he was gonna make us all smoke cigarettes in the mall parking lot at age 9, but he had this certain allure that seemed to imply that he didn’t believe in things like having a bedtime.
Death has less gravitas when you’re a child; everyone winds up in heaven.
Gerber had some issues selling their baby products in France. If you speak French, you can guess why. “Gerber” means “to vomit” in French.
For an example of how vividly these games re-imagined the world of sports, check out this amazing sentence from the game’s Wikipedia page: “When a player dies, their corpse remains on the ice and may be tripped on; between periods, a giant slug acting as an ice resurfacer eats the debris littering the ice.”
“w00t,” says the office ‘cool guy’, who likes to wear his plaid fedora on the group coffee outings while he explains joyfully to everyone about all the circa 2007 bands in which he is interested.
Be exact with your photograph. Avoid pomp and do not be inauthentic. ‘Unnecessary flourish’ is redundant. Do not pose. A pose endears you to no one and reveals only yourself playing at something to which you have no claim, and all the world will see you withering on the vines of your pretension.
Most people will say ‘The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time is the bestZelda’, possibly they will say it was ‘the best video game of all time.’ Those people are totally entry-level or confused by nostalgia. A Link to the Past is the best Zelda, and the best video game of all time [being pretty ‘objective’, using general standards & not my ‘personal faves’] is probably Castlevania Symphony of the Night or Super Metroid.
Feel like Sonic is probably living off of royalties in a really humble apartment somewhere routinely dressing in 1980s-style exercise clothes [primary-colored gym shorts with ‘piping’, matching wristband and sweatband set] despite being inactive; he eats bran flakes in his kitchen and reads the paper, smokes cigarillos guiltily, is surly at articles about Mario’s success.