If I had my way, I would NEVER call my gynecologist back.
3. Instead of monopolizing your time, Seamless actually frees it up — Now you can focus on more important things, like Instagram and your Netflix queue.
7. Issuing a moratorium on the word “abuzz.”
You just don’t really like anyone. At least not more than your Tempur-Pedic pillow.
13. SEAMLESS it up. Tweet about how much you like seamless. Pat yourself on the back for being so groundbreakingly original.
Know what won’t help when you’re elbowing your way through a crowd like a hungry Roseanne Barr? A judgmental friend.
Seamless is like that jealous friend who always encourages you to wear clothes that you know look terrible on you.
Unlike drunk texting, which can ruin everything, drunk ordering only comes with the risk of falling asleep before my pizza arrives.
In 2013, you will cook more and order food off Seamless less. Cooking can mean removing the cardboard box and plastic wrapping from a frozen Amy’s entrée. There’s no shame in the microwaveable meal game.