Saying Goodbye

I keep putting you in this box, keep labeling you as something you’re not, something I can believe in. I keep thinking, every single time, that things will change, that things have changed, that things were never as bad as they were.

But maybe I’ve just been blind.

I’m sorry that it has to be like this. That I am a woman with wandering feet and a heart too full to stay in one place. I’m sorry that I cannot be one you need right now, and that even though I love you, I must chase my dreams first.

And sometimes your life begins after goodbye. When you know you can make it on your own, when you know you can survive, when you know that your hardest goodbye didn’t break you and when you realize how much stronger goodbyes can make you.

When you say goodbye, you will feel a weight lift of your back. You will feel lighter. Your heart will be happier. Because for once, you actually listened to it. And you listened to yourself without second guessing your gut. You finally, loved yourself enough to do what was right for you.

We loved one another, and I felt the relationship was stronger because we knew that we belonged together. We knew that no matter how many times we lost one another, we found each other again. I thought you were it for me.