I think that alongside Redfoo and Sky Blu, I would be probably the greatest Music Designer in history. In fact, I have already legally changed my name to Josh Gondelman, MD in anticipation of the success of my first single. I have designed it in hopes of joining their music-creating group.

On this seemingly endless string of first dates, I’ve picked up a few ideas about dating (only to forget them 48 hours later). So, without further ado, I offer you the Quarter-Lifer Who’s Never Really Done Much Dating but Now Finds Himself Thrown into the Romantic Deep-End’s Guide to Dating, for the Neurotic Self-Saboteur in All of Us.

Last week, Jay-Z and Beyoncé welcomed their first daughter into the world. On January 7th, Beyoncé Knowles gave birth to Blue Ivy Carter, proving one thing and one thing for sure. I really need to get famous.

The requisite beats and moments hit as hard as they need to—Jet Li does kung-fu! Jason Statham cracks wise! MMA star Randy Couture tussles with WWF bruiser Steve Austin!—and the whole thing feels at once rewarding and empty for it.


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 79,382 other followers