lil wayne

My favorite album is probably Pinkerton by Weezer, but I’d rather eat a cardigan for breakfast every day of my life than walk around with a tattoo of that artwork like the poster child for shorthand hipsterism. My grandfather never taught me to draw anything. He did teach me: “Slow down when you’re taking that turn!” That’s not exactly something I want to commit to my flesh forever.

You learn the procedures, you become familiar with how the different coffee tastes and what it mixes well with. It’s not some magical set of spells and incantations that you learn over high-moon ceremonies as you sacrifice a chicken with your shift manager–it’s making god damn espresso.

As of late, however, there seems to be a shift happening. You can feel it in the air, in the rustling of leaves. It’s as though, and perhaps we are all to blame, you’ve overstayed your welcome. What was once charming and novel has become all too familiar and, well, invasive.

Semi-ambitious and fully conscious beautiful biracial butterfly seeks employment. Requires 4 days off/week and $80,000/year+ salary. Will not: wear nametag or bra, answer to authority, keep regular hours, or pass a drug test. Will offer customer service based on the attractiveness of the customer, bare breasts to make sales, take TCBY breaks on a regular basis, starting at 10 am when they open.

While your captive audience is oohing and aahing over your family’s plight in coming to the good ol’ US of A, make sure to throw in that you moved around a lot for your dad’s job since all his bosses were probably racist.  “But you keep it so real!” they’ll say. Yea, because you were raised in the mean streets of like, LA or Miami. No need to mention that you were born and raised in suburbia and went to private school.

This time, the questions come from Watoto From The Nile, a pair of 9- and10-year-old rappers whose song and corresponding video “Letter To Lil’ Wayne” are just that—an open letter to Lil’ Wayne, asking the sizzurp-swilling, curse-word-spewing, women-demeaning rapper to address the objectionable content in his music. Is it a good song? Not really.

Like anything M.I.A. touches, ViCKi LEEKX is blatantly political. It is, after all, a big shout-out to WikiLeaks. And so there are references to the government and freedom and America, all concepts that fit her narrative as a so-called political artist.

In July 2007, rapper Lil Wayne was arrested and charged with carrying a concealed .40 caliber semi-automatic gun. He went to jail in October of last year and was released this morning, despite MTV’s initial reports of a possible day-long delay. Plans of a homecoming party at a Miami strip club have been confirmed.


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