Here are a bunch of hilarious ideas that take very little effort, because there is nothing more spooky, scary, and downright horrifying than having to spend more then 20 minutes on anything in 2014.
“Bro, my flow was so heavy today, I had to use three pads.”
1. I promise that when we binge watch shows on Netflix, I won’t skip ahead.
I would love to clone myself and then challenge the clone to a race, or a game of basketball, or rocks-paper-scissors.
Sending vague “Wanna hang out?” texts instead of inviting someone they’re interested in to actual, set plans.
Here is The Benevolent Sociopath’s Guide to Compassion…
“I have no idea who you even are and I hate you.”
“Do people actually enjoy going out?”
We’re looking at a high pressure adorable front, with fetch speeds reaching up to 10 MPH.
He is sporting cool shades and a leather briefcase, sipping at a Capri Sun pouch like he is cock of the walk. He spots a sexy prepubescent girl at her locker down the hall a ways. Travis approaches her briskly and with the utmost confidence.
“Eighteen yet?” he asks her without shame.