How To

Unsolicited Advice

If you’re wondering if you’re going through a crisis, you probably are. It’s okay; we’ve all been there. But even though you probably don’t want any advice right now, you probably NEED some.

Arrive noisily in the middle of someone reading. Say “I need a bottle opener,” as you open the door. People will look over at you. Look apologetic but still whisper to the people around you, “Do you guys have a bottle opener?”

Let’s be honest: who didn’t become super obsessed with learning how to control dreams after watching Inception? If I could trade places with Ellen Page and go dream-hopping with Leo, I’d never be awake for more than five minutes again. While you won’t be able to jump into someone else’s mind while they’re asleep, you can learn how to control your own dreams and have your own little fantasy world at night when you hit the hay.