24. MICHAEL FASSBENDER LIVES HERE.
You’re still using Soundcloud.
Now I understand what it’s like to come home and be told about the cool new business that opened up in that old warehouse.
More often than not, I find my interests being invalidated by critics of the “indie girl” aesthetic. So I like high-waisted shorts and Polaroid cameras—what’s it to you? I am not defined by my interests and style choices.
If eating at these places makes me a hipster, let me button my shirt all the way to the top, slap on my oversized glasses, and start eating!
1. If you’re wearing Ed Hardy, I immediately pigeonhole you as a douchebag. I’m sorry if you’re not.
I stared out my window. I popped out my eyes. Then I shook. What I saw was a shocking surprise! Every 20-something for miles, the tall and the small, was singing! Without any irony at all!
The more time you spend on Tinder, the more you seem to notice patterns about the people that choose to use this dating app.
The physically weakest males receive all the attention of their female counterparts, while the physically strongest males are met with indifference, if not outright disapproval.
1. The not-nightclub-nightclub, complete with one strobe light and DEEEJAAAAAYY NOOOONAAAMMMEEE *siren noise* *siren noise* *siren noise* You were convinced to go here by some guy passing out sad neon flyers and you knew it was a bad idea as…