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What do you mean you don’t like dancing? Everyone likes dancing, everyone who isn’t an anxiety stricken, socially retarded recluse, everyone with a warm and living soul, everyone who feels an abiding connection with the world-spirit.

Like hovercraft skateboards and lightsabers, many of these items would already exist if scientists would buckle down and get their priorities straight. Here is a (partial) list of foods we should have by now.

I think the existence of the word “nice” allows people who think “there is no good or bad in art” to say things about art while still feeling like “there is no good or bad in art.”

Lots of credit goes to the old, familiar tricks, but few people take the time to stop and recognize the newer tricks in the book. Sure, they may lack the simple elegance of that trick where you point at a stain on someone’s shirt and then poke that person in the face when they look, but there are plenty of modern ploys, dupes, and cons that rival them in effectiveness.

Well, the book was released this week, and what a better way to welcome it to the public with a hilarious reading of it by none other than Samuel L. Jackson! Yesterday I heard that legendary director Werner Herzog was going to do the audio for it – which would have been equally delightful – but I guess Sam Jackson got to it first! Please enjoy, and perhaps play for your own children.

Whenever I see these kinds of videos, one nagging question always comes to mind, and it’s “Who uploaded the video?” My guess is that these two didn’t, and I suppose it would take the humor out of the clip if I knew they had uploaded it and were refreshing it repeatedly, just to see how viral it goes. Anyways! Please enjoy.

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