I know it’s an obvious choice to have the hots for Giada, but I’m only human. Plus, who doesn’t want to have homemade Bruschetta after intercourse? Or during, for that matter?
6. You can’t pour ranch dressing on your lover to make them less bland.
In food fights, just as in life, the best offense is a good defense, which is why I always wear Oakleys on my neck to protect the eyes I had installed in the back of my head.
It’s meant to be so inhumanely gorgeous that you actually quell your hunger a little bit just by osmosis through your eyeballs, and fight the temptation to lick the screen.