“Drunk girl couldn’t find a toilet on Saturday night so proceeded to pee in her handbag.”
Some of these stories will make you lose your faith in humanity. Other stories will make you regain it.
Wow, I really hope some of these are made up…
“We had tickets to a Broadway show. I ate something that disagreed with me and shit my pants while running to the bathroom. And to make matters worse, I was wearing a thong.”
“I was eating cereal and blew on it to cool it down.”
Ernest “Papa” Hemingway has been dead for over fifty years, which means he hasn’t been around to experience the creation of milestone achievements like a cell phone, the internet, or yoga pants. But you’d be foolish to argue that his imprint has ever diminished in modern culture.
The lofty voice, the charitable personality, the Boy Scout skill set. It’s definitely, without a doubt, Tom Hanks.
I’d never know the parents and their litter of children who had left this litter bonanza for me, but I knew then that they would always be a part of my life.
2. Hospital Selfies Are The Best Selfies
The first picture is of the dog. The second is a selfie of a pretty girl with full cheeks and choppy hair. “Looks like Jennifer Lawrence,” I think.