Thought Catalog

Farts

You slowly approach Stall 2 and pull down your dress. Your bathroom guest has not yet left, so you brilliantly flush the toilet as you release your first wind to cover up any ghastly toots or squeeks.

I can’t wait until you see my cry face. It’s super ugly. Crying for the first time in a new relationship is a milestone because it means you care enough about them to let things get bad for a second. I see crying as a positive thing. I don’t trust relationships that are good 24/7 because it usually means they lack a certain level of depth or passion.