2. You take selfies. And then you take group selfies. And then you take a vote on which is the most worthy of going on Instagram.
Every once in a while, you’ll go out with a bunch of your friends and spend the night dancing in the basement of some Lower East Side bar like you don’t have a problem or a care in the world.
I’m speaking from experience here.
I have been barfing like a madman for the past 24 hours and have learned so much about the sport, I could host The World Series of Puking” on ESPN.
I was not a criminal, in fact, I was a political prisoner taken in by the fascist, Gestapo-esque state we lived in.
As we downed them, we realized that we, too, were wearing blazers.
1. You get to watch Pitch Perfect and not feel bad about quoting every single line, even the lyrics that are completely off.
Why is everyone upside down?
Number one — F. Scott Fitzgerald