Chardonnay: You always make your boyfriend watch The Bachelor with you.
Sometimes, her drinking would begin as soon as she woke up, sipping a mix of orange juice and wine as she did her makeup and prepared for the day. It was something we joked about, something I thought was a quirky aspect of a friend I loved.
SOS SOS SOS.
Red wine: You’re incredibly sensual. Like, you probably listen to Prince all day long in preparation for a date.
You were my personal cranberry vodka; I didn’t know how tipsy I could get until I had too much of you.
There is no shame in being that friend that wants to set up the next happy hour while currently at a happy hour.
Take a double shot when you successfully have a nonverbal shit-talking conversation about someone right in front of them.
Rum drinkers make the most low-maintenance girlfriends.
No one seems to care what a drunk has to say quite like they used to.
CHAMPAGNE: You wake up with fully done make-up when The Bachelor “surprises” everyone in the early morning.