I met the love of my life, but I wasn’t the love of yours.
“Screaming it on paper was helping me embody it and define its shape. As an artist I know that I can reshape my mind’s creations. And that was step one.”
There have been times where you have seen me touch places in my brain that I cannot come back from. Dark places that try their damnedest to swallow me whole. But there you are. A light in the dark that helps keep me focused.
Taking anti-depressants is not giving up, it is a privilege.
You are a light, and you have a gift that others cannot gain access to. You are empathetic, you feel strongly, you love loudly, and it is because of the way that you love and the way that you care that causes you to fear and worry. I know.
Cancel the date you’re supposed to have a few days from now. Make up an excuse (you’re good at it). Cancel all dates so you never have to start. Joke about being alone forever and realize it’s your own doing.
You shouldn’t have to ask for your friends to love you during your difficult times. They just should.
Depression makes me feel like it is impossible for me to do anything I want to do. Makes me feel like I am controlled by something I can’t see. Something I can’t control. Something I can’t get rid of.
How do you turn around a week later and attempt to put into words the emptiness that now replaces every single bit of positivity you once felt?
You wake up feeling sad and defeated, like you had a bad dream you just cannot shake off – although what it was about, you can no longer remember.