You have a nickname for her which would be inappropriate to speak in front of your common friends, lest they’d make fun of you.
Set a specific text tone for the person you’re crushing on so you know exactly when said person contacts you.
Love is a marathon. I’ve never been a distance runner, my lungs implode and the acid in my mouth threatens to dissolve my insides. Lust is a sprint. I’ve never been good at those either, but why prolong the pain?
You wanted my love, you wanted my body, you wanted my time, you just did not want me.
I’ve kissed someone who ended up breaking my heart, who loved me but not in the same way or capacity as I loved them. I’ve kissed someone whose kiss I never expected but whose kiss sent a shiver down my spine, goose bumps across my body and butterflies to my stomach.
These 24 people have.
And he tells you about her. You knew about her, of course, but you were hoping it was choice, not circumstance that made him leave. He tells you otherwise.
I thought keeping this will keep you in my life. I eventually learned nothing will. I confess that I hoped I just didn’t hide this from you. Because I realized no matter what I did or did not do and say, I still wasn’t able to keep you.
I’ll say this again: the person you’ve created in your head does not and will never exist. And if by some miracle, which sometimes happen in reality, this person does exist, and they are not the one.
There’s a trail of broken hearts leading from my past to my present but I think it’s leading me somewhere good, to a place where it’s all going to be worth it.