Thanks for all the practice faking orgasms!
Remember when I asked for your opinion? Me neither.
I continuously wonder why do men think women are so scared of being called old, and even why older women get so crazily jealous of younger women? I see it the other way around – I was an idiotic youth, I’m only getting more interesting, sexier, more confident, classy and better with age!
“It’s so hard to find someone that likes me for my personality. All anyone ever compliments me on is my body.”
You know what? That person hates you because she knows your potential. Never stop doing your thing. If anything, do it even better than the way you did before.
“I would die laughing and you would die trying.”
3. Feel my shirt. That’s boyfriend material.
It looks a little too clingy and hard to maintain.
18. Don’t get your panties in a bunch!
I won’t. They’re on the floor next to your mother’s bed.
Being nice to me with the intention of engaging sexually with me, YOU ARE NOT NICE. You should be nice for the sake of being nice, not because you expect me to gratitude-bang you.
5. He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.