1. Your marriage is the biggest influence on my perception of what marriage is supposed to look like.
When I look at a baby I never think, “Oh how adorable,” more like, “Please don’t be seated anywhere near me on the plane.”
The way I see it is that after the magic, after childhood, comes disillusionment.
Auntiehood (or Unclehood) is awesome. Babies are equally as awesome.
You would THINK that the father of the child I was hired to entertain would treat me with some level of respect, right? I mean, his wife is in the next room and I’ve spent the past hour bonding with his daughter, so it would be ridiculous for Daddio to hit on me.
I can’t tell if I want to squeeze the cuteness right out of him, or tell him to relax-it’s only golf, dude.
Have an uninterrupted conversation.
Who will take care of you when you’re old?
I believe that sharing my son’s picture online makes him more safe and this is why.
You know what is better than Christmas? Double Christmas.