It’s my biggest regret.
If I sound like a ravenous, blood-thirsty creature it’s because that’s what happens when you don’t eat meat for a week.
Pancakes would never tag you in an unflattering picture that they only uploaded because it’s a cute picture of them and not give a s*^t how bad you look.
Perfect is the enemy of the good
Sucking, licking, slurping action in the name of nacho cheese dust residue is one of life’s necessary pleasures.
Aesthetically the look and feel of an overstuffed Falafel.
Taco Bell is like that awful person who you probably wouldn’t hookup with sober, but because you’re intoxicated, you say screw it, this is what I want right now.
What the hell is this golf-ball-sized fruit-filled thing doing on my plate, and why does it look like it’s dressed up to go to Cinderella’s ball? Am I supposed to eat it or am I supposed to put it in an expensive glass box and place it on a mantle?