You can never outrun the hangover.
If you drink wine out of a measuring cup, you’re clearly out of f*cks to give.
Vodka Sodas are boring, and so are the people who drink them.
Without you, the fun night could turn into an awful and regrettable memory full of terrible—and potentially fatal—decisions.
Wasted, smashed, tipsy, three-sheets-to-the-wind, gone. Whatever you want to call it there’s something to be said for the magical little moment when your BAC goes from zero to .08.
We all have that one conceited friend who cares more about the pregame pictures and Valencia-filtered Instagrams of the club than actually having a good time.
Every year it’s the same questions. “What are you going to do with your life?” Followed by the classic, “When are we going to meet a boyfriend?” It seems the holidays are about spending time with your loved ones, however, at times it feels as though my family is trying to extend its reach through my intimate life.
Scientists have determined that as the comet hurls through space it is also releasing high volumes of alcohol, maybe as much as 500 bottles of wine per second.
Now booze and sports go together better than ever.
We are a generation very clearly obsessed with brunch. Sunday brunch is “our thing” and it’s not worth attending if it isn’t both boozy and bottomless.