“Envy is merely the meanest form of admiration, and a man who envies another admits thereby his own inferiority.”
4. “Just be yourself.”
What if you’re a jackass?
1. ’Tis better to give than receive.
Fine. Give me everything you have.
19. If someone is making an effort to ignore you, he is not ignoring you.
Woody Allen is his own Bartlett’s, except with a whole lot more material about getting off.
Kafka lived online before the internet: a one-sided spasm of impulsive, desperate communication towards abstract entities wrapped in a pretty face. His aphorisms would have been the world’s greatest tweets; his diary entries ponderous blog posts with that nightmarish 0 comments.