Christina Aguilera went to my high school (North Allegheny). My psychology teacher said she was a bitch and smelled like uncooked hot dogs.
It’s not an insult that you don’t want to meet every guy you connect with, and trust me: for most of them, that’s going to be a huge relief.
Seth MacFarlane doesn’t hate racism. Rest assured, America: Seth MacFarlane hates you.
I was stunned by that first viewing. I saw in quiet awe as the credits rolled. It was transformative. I couldn’t have told you then exactly why.
WE CAN HAZ MOVIE??? …Wait; that’s the wrong meme. Sorry, sorry.
“Did you hear that Ashton Kutcher cheated on his wife? What a slut.”
It’s a land of simultaneous anonymity and overt friendliness. Things happen there that people in other states wouldn’t, couldn’t, fathom.
I’m still trying to say goodbye to November and now you’re trying to tell me that I have to switch gears entirely and pretend to be all pumped for lighting the freaking menorah? I don’t even know where the menorah is right now!
Eat, Pray, Love AKA The Basic Bitch Bible changed your life. One day, when you find yourself trapped in a loveless marriage to a rich man in Connecticut, you’re going to leave him to go find yourself through extensive prayer and pizza.
Men will never be asked the question, “Can you have it all?” because it’s implied that they already do. Their penis entitles them to the life cake and eating it too. They have a monopoly on “All.” They invented “All.” Meanwhile, women are constantly being led to believe that “all” is an elusive thing.