Here’s where the truth hits you: they aren’t laying in their bed, thinking of you too. They are out there, moving on and finding someone else and picking up their own lives.
I don’t want to be with someone who makes me question myself. Asking myself why he didn’t text, why he’s not following up, was it something I said or was it something I did?
In search for myself, I started to lose myself. I was hanging on to the past, and it was hurting me from growing. One day, after a good long cry, I came to a realization: It was me. I was the problem.
I am heavier because I get to have meals with my family where I’m not afraid of being judged. I’ve gained weight because I spend every Friday with my best friend watching RuPaul and eating pizza. I’ve gained weight because I am surrounded by people who love me unconditionally in whatever shape or size I come in.
I think about the smile the stranger at the bus stop gave me. I think about how tired I was in the morning when I woke up. I think about my family in a land 4000 miles away in a different time zone who are probably sound asleep.
Time went by and depression crept in and the wall she would keep her safe felt toxic and so the struggle began to get pass the wall.
Every weird thing you do before bed. From creating concoctions of coconut oil and lavender to put in your hair to prepping your weekly vitamins in color coordinated pill boxes, she’s literally seen it all.
Everyone probably knows someone or is friends with someone that experiences anxiety. It can be really hard to know what to say to these friends if you haven’t actually had anxiety yourself.
Leave the small talk behind you, and fill in the spaces with what you love.