Congressional Missed Connections
You: Filibuster Brown.
Me: Shrinking junior member in the last row.
Your recitation of whole episodes of Murder She Wrote was brilliant. Didn’t want it to end but I fell asleep in hour 16 and when I woke up, you were gone. Email me, I want to hear what matters to you.
??Senate Dining Room last week, you were eating with some old guys and you caught me looking at you, lol. Was that bow-tie for real? Dying to know.
Getting our shoes shined together and I was coveting your tawny Fratellis. Wanted to talk about redistricting but you said that’s for behind closed doors. Can’t stop thinking about that.
Me: Dashing salt and pepper Rep. yelling at an aide in the hallway.
You: Ravishing constituent on a tour of the chamber last Tuesday.
I’m not really that scary. Send a pic so I know it’s you.
??Even though you were across the aisle, I caught your eye roll when the Speaker said “nay” to our bill. Just wanted to let you know you made my day. Compromise soon?
Am I crazy or were you were looking right at me every time you said “two-party system?” If this sounds familiar, email and tell me I’m not crazy.
??After Appropriations yesterday you jokingly proposed a “subcommittee to kill some brain cells.” Sounds more like a caucus to me. Where do I sign up? :)
??Debated you on TV the other night and I can’t get your hair out of my mind. I was too shy to ask but I have to know who you see when you’re in the beltway. Is it Frances at the Ritz? Put “Activist Judges” in the subject of the email so I know it’s you.
??Scene: Barry’s SOU
Me: Wishing I was anywhere else
You: Laughing at something on your phone.
We made eye contact. I was wondering if you play Words With Friends.? Your move: MinorityWhippit
?You met with me in your office last month, I was the one worried about losing my job. That smile looked like more than just glad-handing. Well I lost my job, but maybe I gained a friend (you)? It’s probably a shot in the dark if you’ll ever read this but my fingers are crossed anyway. Like you said, things have to start going my way sometime right? Let me know.
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My father was a 911-call taker. The worst calls he got were suicide calls where pretty much all he heard was someone immediately saying “hello, my name is John doe and I live at 123 abc Street and I’m going to kill myself…bang.”
DIY beauty treatments.
This dangerously real replica of Arya Stark’s infamous “Needle” is, I think, capable of skewering little fat boys, impaling indignantly injured kids’ necks (and killing them), or using for some seriously epic shish kebabs. Probably don’t get this for a kid!
“Here’s to alcohol, the rose colored glasses of life.”