Thought Catalog
April 12, 2017

What It’s Like To Love Someone Who’s Bipolar

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What is the issue?
Brooke Cagle

I’m going to start this off by being completely honest; loving someone who’s bipolar is extremely hard. It takes a lot of patience, understanding, and unconditional love. So let’s begin.

1. The slightest things will set them off. What may not seem like a big deal to you, will most likely be a big deal to someone who’s bipolar. You need to refrain from doing things that could set them off. Whatever makes them uncomfortable, don’t do it. Whether that be not going to the bars with friends anymore without them with you or not hanging out with the opposite sex alone. Nothing is worse than having someone who doesn’t try to work with you and make you comfortable in a relationship. You need to find out what their triggers are and try your best to not set them off. Yes, it’s hard but let me tell you, nobody is going to love you more unconditionally than someone who’s bipolar. We know what it’s like for someone to leave because of the problems going on in your head and we strive to make the mess in your head less hectic.

2. Their jealousy will be over the top. Being bipolar, our emotions and what we feel are more extreme than other people. Therefore, the jealousy we feel can consume us and at times become unbearable. Please don’t make us feel bad for getting angry with you if you’re hanging out with another girl or out at a party. Thoughts will invade our minds and make us think of things that aren’t true. Just text often and even call for reassurance. Tell us you love us and that you only want us. But where comes extreme jealousy, comes extreme love. And my God do we love.

3. They’ll say things they don’t mean. When we feel an emotion, we feel it to the core. Anger turns into madness and depression turns into darkness. We’ll get mad over things that seem irrelevant to you and might say things we don’t mean. But remember, we don’t mean them. We will try our best to make up for whatever we said because it kills us to hurt you in any way. But where there is anger and sadness, there is happiness. And nothing is more beautiful and wonderful than the happiness from someone who’s bipolar. It will light up a room and bring a smile to you face. Remember those times when we mess up with our words.

4. They lose control. We will flip a switch in simplest terms. We can go from being happy to being angry to being sad in a matter of minutes. We can’t stop the switch in emotions and it will make us want to die because we don’t want you to have to deal with it. We will bawl our eyes out and hate ourselves because we can’t stop ourselves from yelling at you over something that upsets us. Self destruction can accompany this loss of control. Don’t get mad at us. Hold us and tell us that you’re not going to leave no matter how hard it gets. We will have the utmost respect and gratitude towards you and when you’re the one losing control, we will stop the insanity going on in your mind. We will calm your soul and give you every part of us. We will give you unconditional love.

5. They will get overwhelmed. Being bipolar is extremely mentally draining. We get tired of the shifts in mood, the reckless behavior, the irrational thoughts; we just want to shut our minds off but we can’t. We’ll break down and want it all to be over. We’ll become suicidal. We might even try to hurt ourselves. When we get this way, wrap your arms around us and hold us tight. Remind us that we’re worth it and that you love us. Nothing is better than hearing those three words, “I love you” and getting a kiss to take away the pain.

Don’t give up. It’s worth it in the end. I promise. TC mark

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