Go Get Wasted Tonight With Your Best Friends

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Having an Amazing Night Out With Your Best Friends is necessary for your emotional well-being but it’s like cooking a souffle: the slightest disturbance could cause it to crumble. After all, Amazing is just around the corner from Terrible. They’re neighbors. They sometimes even hang out, so you have to be very aware of how precarious your good time can be. One false move and, boom, you’re sobbing and hailing a cab. Your hair turns into a beehive, mascara magically appears and runs down your face, and you whisper creepily into your cab driver’s ear, “How could a fun night take such a turn for the worse?” (And the cab driver is like “Um, get out of my cab!”)

In order for you to have the perfect night out with your friends, the stars have to align. There needs to be something in the air, a certain kind of energy that lends itself to hedonism and debauchery. Simply put, everyone has to want to get crazy. There can’t be the “Um, I think I’m going to go home…” friend or “I’m not drinking tonight. Sorry!” That disrupts the flow of the night and also makes people take a harder look at themselves. They think “Should I go home too? I do have to be up early.” You can’t question your decision to have a crazy night out. The second you question it, it loses its magic and you’re done.

It’s about synchronicity. It’s about seeing friends you haven’t seen in a long time and wanting to reconnect in the fastest way possible by getting drunk and creating a memory. It’s about working your ass off and needing a night where you just let life happen to you. It’s about warm weather and being at the perfect venue. It’s about not letting yourself second guess anything.

You need to dance. You need to be that asshole who’s singing along to “…Baby One More Time.” You’re usually the person who mocks the Britney Spears sing-a-long but not tonight. Tonight you don’t have the energy to be a Judge Judy. You know it gets you absolutely nowhere besides alone in your bed so screw it. You’ll sing to Britney. Maybe it’ll make you happier. Maybe it’ll get you health coverage and a live-in boyfriend. Just maybe.

When you’re having a great night out with your friends, hooking up isn’t a priority. I mean, if Ryan Gosling came up to you and was like “Wanna do things to my dick?” you would be like “K.” But you aren’t looking for it. That’s not what the night’s about. You’re more interested in taking over the dance floor and acting like a crazy person with people who will go there with you. And, by the way, anytime I just act like an unabashed freak on a leash with my friends at a bar, I get lots of attention from men. It’s a hilarious albeit cruel joke. The nights I make sure to look extra cute and go with one other friend to talk to some boys, nothing ever happens. I really don’t want to be that person who believes that you don’t get attention when you actively seek it out. To a large extent, I don’t think it’s true because we’re always subconsciously looking for something. But when people want me more when I’m surrounded by a group of friends and looking like Tara Reid in Taradise, it really makes you start to wonder.

When you think (or write) too much about what it means to have a crazy night out with your BFF’s, you start to become paranoid that your life is an actual episode of Sex and the City. You wonder if every feeling you experience is cliched and stupid and then you just want to unfeel every feeling ever. So let’s stop that. Just go out tonight with your best buddies and let your hair down. Don’t worry about looking stupid or acting insane. Remember that everyone around you is 65% creepy anyway.

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image – Andrea Flannery