How to be Rejected

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Spend your time with someone who has lost all their love for you. Torture yourself. Wonder where and how they could’ve misplaced it. They had it with them that day at the fair; they held it tight during so many lunches and days spent in bed. But now it’s vanished into thin air. Ask where the love went. “I don’t know. I just don’t think of you in that way anymore.” Become instant oatmeal, become cream of wheat. They’ve reduced you to mush and now they’ll eat you up. Yum.

Delude yourself into thinking you can beat the rejection, like you can give it a stern pat on the butt and send it on its way. Dedicate your time to winning this person’s approval. Wear the right shirt, get a nice haircut, and honestly believe just for a second that it will make any difference. They fail to recognize your efforts and ask if you want to get a coffee. You say yes because you would say yes to everything, but you don’t want fucking coffee. You want to fucking fuck. Fuck.

Your friends will tell you that you’re some sort of masochist. Every second spent with this person who has rejected you is a slow stinging slap to the face. The sad part? You want more. You’re determined to make them love you. You will track down where the love went and put it back into their mind, body, and heart. “OMG, look what I found at the beach today?! Your feelings for me! They were just buried underneath all of this sand. Can you believe it? I’m so glad it’s back to its rightful owner. Can we make out now?” But none of it will work. The love doesn’t fit anymore; the entrance is sewn up for good. You will have to eventually accept that they no longer love you before you lose the love you have for yourself.

There are plenty of other things to be rejected by anyway. Why waste your time on just a lover? You can be rejected by colleges, jobs, friends, a landlord, or some big scary guy at a bank. Hell, even your parents might not care about you! Isn’t it amazing? There are so many things in this world that do not want you. They see your face and run screaming. “Oh my god! There’s that person with the low-income, laughable SAT test scores, bad hair, worse hygiene and annoying nose! Get it away! Agggh!”

Now thanks to technology, rejection has been made easier than ever. On BlackBerry Messenger, for example, you can tell when someone has read your text message and hasn’t responded. Isn’t that fun?! Text messaging is responsible for 10,000 rejections daily. Here’s how it happens.

You: Hey. What R u up to right now?
Person Who Is Rejecting You: Not sure. Eating food with Amanda right now. Probably going to a party at Max’s later.
You: OK! Let’s keep in touch. I wanna hang!
{TEN MINUTES OF SILENCE}
You: So just let me know. Where does Max live again?
Person Who Is Rejecting You: Not sure…
You: OK! Text me the address when you get a chance!!!

FOREVER SILENCE

You’re done. You’re rejected. And depending on what kind of person you are, their rejection can act as the oxygen you need to breathe, or you can just shake it off like Mariah Carey always does.

Flip-flop between wanting everyone to like you and avoiding the possibility of rejection, and not giving a damn about anyone who has ever said, “Do not want!” It’s hard. You want to feel good enough for everyone and everything. Realize this may not be possible. Spend the rest of your life chasing after people who reject you and running away from it. Or just be really healthy and well-adjusted. Um…..

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image – Steve Snodgrass