A lot of people mean well when giving you advice, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a bunch of cliché garbage. As much as I appreciate someone telling me to keep my chin up when going through a hard time, I’m fairly certain I’d rather them let me punch dance out my rage in their backyard. Here are eight most generic, useless pieces of advice you’ll ever receive.
1. Don’t worry about failing.
Maybe you shouldn’t worry about it, but you should definitely be concerned about failing. If no one worried about failing, then everyone would invest all of their money in high risk stocks, then when the stocks plummeted and you lost your home and can’t afford to eat, maybe then you’d give a little thought to failing. It’s not a bad thing to plan ahead. Having a backup plan doesn’t mean you believe you’re going to fail. It means some things happen, even if you do everything right, so why not be prepared?
2. When dating, don’t be too available.
Can we just stop this nonsense? If you like someone and they want to hang out the next day, go hang out with them! Don’t play games and don’t hide how you feel in hopes of making them more desperate for your affection. Now, of course, don’t be a stalker, but the whole deal with intentionally going MIA for days after is an idiotic concept.
3. It’s just who you are.
Hey guess what? If you’re a terrible jerk, don’t just say, “Sorry, it’s just how I am.” You’re giving a pathetic excuse to justify your terrible behavior. If there’s a bad habit you’re aware of, or you notice you treat people close to you terribly, don’t just blame it on genetics. Try to correct it and be a better person.
4. Money isn’t important.
You know who always says this? People who have lots of money. No one that’s drowning in overwhelming debt will ever say this to you. The obsession with money isn’t healthy, but it’s much easier to be happy when your refrigerator is full and all of your bills are paid. Just stop saying this one, because it’s beyond insulting.
5. Just snap out of it and be happy.
This sums up how it feels when someone says that to you:
for years i lived w/ unbearable anxiety & depression until the fateful day u said “snap out of it” & “just be happy”. thank u sir, ur a hero
— TORMNIABLY PIACKEELS (@Tormny_Pickeals) June 1, 2013
6. Just follow your heart.
You know that feeling that you think is your heart? A lot of the time that feeling is actually a little south of your heart and coming from inside your pants. When every logical thought in your head tells you not to do something, it’s not necessarily wrong. I know we all want that moment where you quit your job and take a chance on that beautiful stranger you just met, but this isn’t Friends. I know I sound like the biggest downer ever, but, believe it or not, you can have a relationship that is both romantic AND practical.
7. Don’t ever think in “What ifs.”
If you sit around and think about things like “What if I get bit by a spider like Peter Parker? Will I have to get a different job? Will my uncle die?” that’s crazy. However, thinking about what you would do if you lost your job, isn’t insane, it’s planning ahead. Too many people live every day with no thought of the future whatsoever. Don’t spend all of your time worrying, but a little planning will always pay off.
8. Forget about your past.
The correct thing you should do here is don’t dwell on past mistakes. Forgetting your past is the worst thing you can do, because forgetting it will destine you to repeat it. Learn from your past and grow from your mistakes, but don’t let the mistakes of yesterday prevent you from doing something amazing today. Can we hug now?