1. Cry your heart out. It is always best to mourn the loss than to give it the cold shoulder. Let those tears flow and let them overflow, but do not exceed to three days. Listen to your theme songs and browse your “all-pinks-and-hearts” love scrapbook over and over again and cry some more.
2. Binge on food you have so avoided during family reunions, several Christmases and romantic dates. Grab the biggest packs of carbo (with helluva cholesterol on the side!) in the grocery. Unleash the starved monster in you. Chips, ice creams, pizza, burger, pork, rice, rice and more rice… Yum!
3. On the morning of the third day, stand in front of your full body mirror. Do you like this pathetic, panda- eyed girl with sacks of eye bags, messy hair and baggy clothes (and smelly breathe too!) staring back at you? You won’t, of course. This day you start gaining your old self back.
4. Go to church. Talk to Him, your true lover. Thank Him for the new and clean pages He will provide for you to write fresh memories and experiences for this new chapter in your life. Thank Him that though hurt, you’re alive, breathing, and still beautiful.
5. Pamper thy self. Head to the spa. Have a soothing massage. Ditch the stress (and very soon, the ex). Loosen up the tension you bestowed upon your body and mind.
6. You may opt for a new hairstyle but this is entirely up to you. You may want no spotlight on the reason behind the new looks by the family, friends or your officemates. Do not do drastic and ridiculous changes in your crowning glory. Be sure that whatever you’ll do with your mane accentuates your best features. During this time, looking good makes you feel better.
7. Talk with the family. Be ready for some smothering by your family members with your big bro’s “bastard-should-pray-we-do-not-meet-again” litany on the background. Your brothers and Daddy’s murderous plans may be exaggerated but this is just because they don’t want anyone hurting you. Assure them you’re fine, and that they should get over the SOB, too, just in case they were serious with the connivance.
8. Reconnect with friends. You sure have lost communication with your pals during your past relationship, and it’s time to revive it. Apologize that you were not able to hang out with them so much like when you were still in singlehood (curse the SOB!) and ask them to lunch or dinner. After so, there’s nothing like a strong support group in these trying times. Later on, you can have again your “TGIF -night-outs”.
9. Rewire the enthusiast in you. Continue that article you shelved for the ex’s after-work basketball games and Sunday lunches with family. Start the mural you were thinking of putting on your bedroom walls. You may want to study baking or gardening or learning another language. Read the stack of still-covered, dusty collection of books on your bedside. Enrich your mind with new knowledge. You may also like to grab the 50SOG Trilogy and be inspired with a weave of different, world- rocking love story ever!
10. Enjoy the peace and quiet and solitude. Relax and rest at home or go strolling when it’s your day off work. Or go to the gym and yoga classes to keep a fit body and mind. Dim your lights, lay on the bed, close your eyes and let yourself whirl with the soft music playing on your IPod. Evaluate where you are now in the different aspects of your life. Are you still on track with your timeline of goals? Assess the significance of your objectives. Adjustments should be made, right? Pencil in a new aim. Eye another dream. And start making it happen.
12. Let it go, forgive. Admit that things are over now and accept it. Do not be hard on yourself by holding grudge to this person. Free yourself of the resentment, disappointment, anger, hatred even, towards him. People make mistakes, some even relish it. But by letting off the wrongs, you prove to be the one who loved more, genuinely. By doing this, you take a leap to where you were always headed, to where you were fated to be in. Unburden both yourselves of the baggage from the past. Once upon a time, you were madly in love, and it was happily-ever-after without each other… This was always how your “The End” will be.
13. Lastly, go back to that full body size mirror. You’ll know when the right time to do this comes. The previous days, weeks, months have changed you. You are still mending the bruises and contusions in that little muscle beating inside, but look at yourself. You look better. You feel better. You must have felt the worst kind of hollow when he left you, but here you are now, reining your life, standing steadfast. You are strong, woman, and you are a beauty, in and outside. Now that you have started, do not stop. You may falter at times, but you can turn things around because this is all in your hands. You are the one in control. The pain has caused someone tougher, wiser and much more improved version of yourself to emerge. You Version 2.0 had the rollercoaster ride in extreme but you now know what you deserve so you’ll be treading this journey painstakingly.
And utter these words: Lift that head up high, Gorgeous. You have learned. You are equipped. You are a woman of worth. Do not settle for less than what you deserve. Let go of the life entwined with the past. Look ahead and chase the brighter days ahead. Take care of that heart but be not afraid to love again. Because somewhere, another heart’s been broken and been recuperated, just so you live your heart’s desires when you find each other.