Thought Catalog
March 13, 2017

12 Women Reveal The Major Red Flag They No Longer Ignore When Dating Someone

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What is the issue?
Jason Briscoe

1. Texting back a day later. Or a few days later. If a man doesn’t text you back right away, he’s probably not that interested or serious about you. Men are glued to their phones, so there’s no way he didn’t see your messages. He did, he just didn’t think it was worth replying to right away.” — Karina, 28

2.When he says one thing and does another, or when he’s always so flaky with his plans and he doesn’t follow up, it’s a red flag that you’re not the only one he’s charming.” — Teresa, 25

3.How he treats you in front of his friends. Is he cold with you? Is he uncomfortable around you? Are his friends treating you like just another one of his girls? It’s very important to notice how his friends treat you because it says so much about what he told them about you.” — Megan, 26

4.Shallow conversations. If all he’s interested in knowing about me is the stuff he can easily find out on social media or if our conversations are all just jokes and flirting but nothing deeper, then it’s a bad sign for me. It shows that he’s not interested in really getting to know me and he just wants to have fun.” — Jackie, 28

5.No effort. If there’s no effort, there’s no relationship. Trust me on this one, men make the effort when they want someone. They don’t get lazy.” — Lisa, 24

6.His social media activity. I know people tell me not to pay much attention to it, but it tells you so much about him. If he’s always liking half-naked selfies, following all these models or just flirting with a bunch of girls, he’s not really ready to have his eyes set on one person only.” — Sarah, 23

7.What his friends say about him. If his friends are warning you or telling to stay away or he’s a heart breaker. Please LISTEN to them. They’re not talking him up or being funny, they’re trying to send you a very CLEAR message.” — Crystal, 30 

8. “When he doesn’t say yes to your invitations. If he keeps refusing all your invitations or not rescheduling when he can’t make it, he’s obviously not trying to see you or he doesn’t really care about making some time for you.” — Jasmin, 27

9.When he just disappears without telling you why. If he doesn’t explain to you the reason behind his sudden change in behavior, he doesn’t respect you enough to either tell you what’s going on or he’s probably dating someone else.” — Natalie, 25

10.When he treats like he treats all his girlfriends. If he’s sweet, friendly and charming to every girl he knows, then this is just who he is. You should always try to see how he treats you in front of his female friends too. Is he trying to make you jealous? Or is he trying to let them know he’s taken?” — Hanna, 22

11. “How he reacts when you confront him. Guys don’t like confrontations, we all know that, but they do when they care about someone. So if he doesn’t want to have any difficult conversations with you or runs away from ‘the talk,’ he’s not that serious about you or your relationship.” — Amber, 31

12. How he talks about his ex. If he had a recent break up or he’s missing his ex or his ex is still in his life one way or another, run away baby. His heart is still with her even if you think you’re better than her.” — Nevin, 29TC mark

Rania Naim is a poet and author of the new book All The Words I Should Have Said, available here.

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