6 Things Only Children Are Tired Of Hearing

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We are a judged and misunderstood breed. From that first confused look from your middle school friends to the same look from your adult co-workers, people are perplexed by only children.  Despite the vast differences among us, I think we can all agree on some ludicrous statements we are just sick of hearing. Yes, we may be out of the ordinary, but chances are we like it that way.

1. You’re an only child? You must be spoiled.

Probably the most common statement among the bunch. Yes, I do understand that in your simple mind only child = spoiled. However, that is not necessarily the case. Just because a person doesn’t have siblings, doesn’t mean they got everything they wanted as a kid and was lavished with gifts. Chances are, they are still waiting for that pony Santa promised them when they were five.

2. Do you like being an only child?

Do you like having three siblings? Probably not, but you love them anyway. I didn’t choose the only child life, my parents chose it for me.  Whether I like it or wish I had a big sister to show me the ropes, most likely my life has always been this way. We only children don’t know any other way. So please save us your psychoanalysis, and let us be.

3. Why didn’t your parents have more children?

I’m sorry, but I don’t recall giving you permission to ask about my parent’s sex life. Because…that’s a gross mental image I would never be able to remove from my mind. Maybe my parents only wanted one kid; maybe it was a difficult pregnancy maybe… it is absolutely none of your business. Unless you want to pay for my therapy, please save the nosiness for another topic.

4. Are you super close to your parents?

I am actually, next question.   

5. Don’t you get lonely?

Yes, all the time. Which is precisely why I have an overactive imagination and a close attachment to my friends. Doesn’t everyone get lonely sometimes?! I recognize that the common understanding is that only children are some type of social pariah that have no idea how to get along with others. I also can’t deny the fact that yes, to an extent this is true. We like to have our way, are often told how “special” we are and had to learn some social lessons the hard way. Yet we still manage to functionally exist in society, I know…shocking.

6. Oh…that explains a lot.

I am going to give you the benefit of the doubt and assume that you mean that explains my impeccable good taste and awesome personality. So thank you, you’re not so bad yourself.