For those star-crossed lovers reading this article, this is a warning: This may drastically change something in your relationship or who knows, maybe everything. So, if you feel like you are not ready to face the uncertainty of the assurance that the person you are with is the one, then it is regrettably suggested that you forget reading this piece and continue the vicious cycle of the love life you are in.
However, sorry to burst the bubble but there is just no assured assurance that your partner right at this very moment will be there for life. Well, that is unless you tie her by the rough reins of your flowery promises and forceful threats, then you’ll have a lasting yet suffocating relationship which by the way, should not be called a relationship at all. With that said, we still have the right to feel the hope to spend a lifetime with a special someone. But if that were the case, how would you really know if you can pin your hopes on that person?
1. You are more than ready to face the dark monsters of your past.
No, you don’t just run away. You don’t just forget. You face your issues, conflicts and past mistakes head on. You cannot just let go of the imprisoning bind of the hurting memories. You have to feel its excruciating and humiliating pain. But bear in mind that you don’t have to do it alone. As much as your family and friends are the special constants in your life, it is an indescribable feeling to be able to confide those painful experiences with the love of your life. He will be the shoulder you’ll lean upon to gather the strength and the will to move on. He should be able to assure you that your soul is still beautiful as it is, no matter how shattered or broken it has been. If and when he does not budge or become intimidated, then it’s a positive hopeful sign.
2. After the past comes the present connection.
Love should not be forced. It should not be fixed. It is not done in a hurry nor thought upon for a very long time. Love should be natural and spontaneous. There is no coincidence nor accident in experiencing true love. One does not learn to love rather you learn to understand and accept. But to able to understand and accept, there has to be love at the very start. Love bridges all gaps and brings upon a connection that only the two of you would feel. This connection is splendid, even magical in its totality. It’s a miracle of all sorts. You don’t know how to define it. It’s not connection anymore if you are capable to put it into words. Every single time, you stutter and become utterly speechless when you try to describe the uplifting feeling it gives you. It is a sky full of stars. It is million of roads converging into one. It is that radiant glow in the light, that vibrating beat of the drum. Yes, it is that special.
3. And then both of you work towards what lies ahead.
There should be hard work and conscious effort in a relationship no matter how you think you are deeply connected with each other. Your individual differences and conflicting preferences simply won’t go away easily. There will be days that one of you should love and sacrifice more. There will be times that one of you will be at the edge of the cliff. It is how a couple perfect the little imbalances that will balance the entirety of their relationship. There is no shortcut to a successful relationship. You can’t just slide your way through the smooth path. You have to go through the rocks and stones with bare feet. Sometimes you walk hand in hand on that rocky road together, but other times you take turns in carrying each other. It’s that simple and difficult. Sacrifice is not just sparing yourself of the last piece of chicken during dinner nor is it just giving a precious portion of your time for your partner. It is taking in all the pain and not using that as a leverage. Sacrifice is risking your very soul and entrusting your heart without the certainty that it will receive the love it deserves.
If you found these in the person you are with now and he gives you an assurance that he feels the same way to you, then there it is. Go for it.