I know that just one tub of sweet-n-sour is not, and never will be, enough — I am prepared to avoid eye contact whilst I demand another to satisfy my hearty nugget dipping.
Do you think humans are inherently evil? Have you ever kissed a girl? Can’t you just imagine us cuddling? Are you romantic? Will you hold my hand? Do you think humans are meant to be monogamous?
When I made the move to a big city without much in the way of disposable income and a 95 square foot apartment — yes, you read that correctly — you saved me from the brink of self-immolation by giving me loft bed options that maximized the space.
I remember wearing suspenders that had silver Michael Jackson gloves attached to them, and blasting Madonna’s “Like a Virgin” even though I was five years old and clueless about its meaning.