We begin our practice, and all eyes are on you, Yoga Douche. Not because you skillfully transfer from Warrior Three into Standing Splits, but because you are wearing a bright green t-shirt with the words READING SUCKS emblazoned in all capital letters across the front. Who are you, Yoga Douche? Why are you dressed like a 90’s bully?
After careful deliberation and excessive amounts of self-doubt, you have been invited to attend the Pants Party. Count yourself lucky, as this is a newly inspired event, stemming from the great red carpet viewing of “American Pie: Naked Mile” much time ago.
Make sure to selectively misspell words to show that you’re tipsy and having a great time.
Yoga pants: Regardless of you waking up late or having that late night stint at Taco Bell – these bad boys made your behind look scrumptious.