I Got Robbed, It Was Kind Of My Fault
“It’s 1:30 a.m.” This announcement is met with groans and shivers. “We have to get home,” the littlest one says to the others. My adult alarm starts to go off. Children… must… get… home… me. Adult. You. Children. Must help children.
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Steph is a former editor at Thought Catalog and a current writer at Gawker Media. Her work has been featured on ... 
Applying NBA Jam Vernacular To Nightlife
The Nail in the Coffin is the shot that you clearly did not need. It ends your night and throws all hopes of frisky behavior with the opposite sex out the window. The Nail in the Coffin is the Cab Shot: the shot that makes you take a cab home, where under different circumstances you would be lucid enough to take the damn train.
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He likes Legos, Mobb Deep and Raymond Carver and contributes to pirateapprentice.com. He always wondered what it ... 
Open Letter To Guys Who Jump Instead Of Dance At Clubs
Please stop. I’ve had enough of your raucous nonsense. Like for real, dudes, go back to earnestly swaying or self-consciously nodding your head. Or, better yet, just stand awkwardly while ogling girls. There is nothing worse than you jumping up and down like you’re at my eighth-grade birthday party at the trampoline gym…
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Brent Delaney totes his MFA in screenwriting from York University around attempting to use it as bus fare. When ... 
Playing With Mr. Chan
My middle school was intent on giving us a thorough cultural education. While most of us were already learning an instrument after school, they added a music class to the curriculum. For this they hired Mr. Chan.
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Julian Belvedere does not live in New York City. He is occasionally bright, sometimes charismatic, and nearly ... 
Things You Need When You’re Sad
Your world is falling apart around you, sort of like that scene from Inception where Juno is learning to build and destroy environments. You’re reverting to your most petulant childish self in response, because when the going gets tough, the tough sometimes take a while to kick-start. If you’re anything like me, here are some of the things you’re going to need to get you through.
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Kate George is the Managing Editor at Portable.tv. Lives like Die Hard but with a Katy Perry vibe. Follow her on ... 
