There are some songs that make your heart feel as though it will burst out of your chest from sheer emotion — and that emotion can vary. Sometimes it’s profound sadness, sometimes from aching nostalgia, and sometimes from the kind of excitement accompanied by a “THIS IS MY SONG OH MY GOD YES YES YES PUT IT ON ME DJ!”
You see, I have cable television, which means I have The Learning Channel, the History Channel, The Travel Channel, and The Discovery Channel. These educational networks dispense valuable wisdom to me.
I have at least five alarm clocks, none of which have snooze buttons and none even close to being at arm’s length from my bed. I have set up habits that put me in a sleepy mood earlier in the evening. I have taken pills. I have done everything save be shocked with a cattle prod in the morning.
On my 15th Thanksgiving, I stopped eating meat. A quiet decision that entailed not eating turkey that day, realizing that I didn’t miss it, and not eating another piece of meat after that. Haven’t since.