“I would rather see less and feel more, than see everything and feel little.”
Long term travel is definitely not all it’s cracked out to be and there’s nothing wrong or disheartening about that.
YES, you meet loads more people, see loads more stuff and experience loads more in general. But there comes a point where you become OVERLOADED.
I am compelled at times to question whether I am built to experience so much, so often. It’s as if I have moments where my mind/body/soul malfunction from too much information that I just freeze. I can’t help but ask myself, “What the hell am I doing? What am I even achieving anymore? Is there some sort of race to see and do more than everyone else?”
I’ve learned that quantity is definitely not quality as the old cliché warned me many years ago. With the more people I meet, the more places I go and the more things I see the less I seem to care. Many relationships (not all) are superficial and finish as soon as they begin. I find myself cherishing pre-existing friendships that I have invested so much time and care into previously.
Living such a transient lifestyle causes you to develop an attitude of non-attachment as some sort of survival technique to minimize the amount of emotional pain you experience. It’s good to experience pain, life is about balance and when you try to avoid the “bad” stuff you find yourself losing appreciation for the good stuff in the process. To much of a good thing can – believe it or not – be a bad thing. Like when you’ve only been eating junk food you feel sick and just crave a freaking salad!
I know change is inevitable but its definitely more amplified and unpredictable on the road. I miss structure, I miss the stability of a stable income and a social netball team! Why the hell didn’t I appreciate these things when I had them?
“Worn out” is an understatement at times but I can’t say certain hard times were avoidable had I chosen a different path. Just as I realised that committing myself to the traveler lifestyle wouldn’t solve all my problems or ensure avoidance of upcoming ones. That fantasy was quickly woken up to.