13 Men On The Woman They Thought They Loved, And How They Knew She Wasn’t The One

@BYONELOVE
@BYONELOVE

1. “I think with time I started to ‘love’ her less and then I realized that love shouldn’t lessen over time, if anything it should get stronger. You don’t get bored with a woman you love, boredom is the result of infatuation that’s wearing off.” —Austin, 28

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2. “I knew she wasn’t the one when we moved in together. I thought living with her would bring us closer, but it just made us both realize we’re completely wrong for each other.” —Devon, 26

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3. “When I’d go out with my friends I’d frequently hit on other women, and I knew it was kinda fucked, but I never actually cheated. It became a problem when I started considering actually following through with these women, and that’s when I knew maybe I just wasn’t completely happy with her.” —Frank, 27

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4. “One word. Jealousy. She’s not the one if she’s jealous, jealous of anything really, other women, my career, my success, my achievements, real love isn’t jealous.” —Will, 25

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5. “I think I just realized that we were very different people. Not in the good way. We didn’t have the same outlook on things that mattered. Things that dealt with what kind of people we each wanted to be, and they just didn’t line up.” —James, 25

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6. “It doesn’t come down to one specific reason. I can’t pinpoint how I figured out I didn’t want to be with her forever, but I think as you get older you start to realize what you really want, and sometimes it’s very different from what you used to want, and you have to man up and admit when you know you want something more, or something else.” —Michael, 27

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7. “It was definitely the kids issue. She wanted to get married, start a family very early on, while there were still things I wanted to accomplish on my own before doing any of that, and that is precisely why we ended.” —Sam, 25

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8. “I was with her for 8 years, and I think that’s the only reason I continued to stay with her. I don’t think either one of us truly loved each other in the last days of that eighth year, I think we just became so comfortable and we were both equally scared to leave, and then worse, to be lonely.” —Noah, 30

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9. “She subtly made me choose between her and my best girl friend, who I’ve known my entire life. I’m not going to give up people who matter in my life for a significant other. I didn’t ask for them to be best friends, just to accept that they both are a part of my life, and she couldn’t do that. So, friends first. That’s just how I operate.” —Eric, 25

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10. “My mom died while we were dating, and she wasn’t there for me the way I needed her to be. That’s how I knew.” —Brendan, 26

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11. “Honestly, politics. Never thought politics could somehow ruin a romantic relationship, but this year, they definitely did.” —Ricky, 25

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12. “I think the hardest part of recognizing that it’s not really ‘meant to be,’ is admitting it to yourself, and then the harder part is admitting it to them. It sucks.” —Craig, 27

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13. “I definitely confused infatuation with ‘love,’ and I confused the two very early on in our relationship. And as stupid as that sounds, for some reason the quickness of it all made me think the ‘love’ between us was more legitimate. I think actual love isn’t really dependent on how fast you fall for each other, but rather how long your initial feelings towards each other last. I’ve been with my current girlfriend for two years and I still get that stomach feeling that I had when I first met her. I think that’s what real love is.” —Dave, 26 Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Writer based in the Philadelphia area. Person who really loves her dog and watching cooking shows. Check out my writing on Thought Catalog and follow me on Facebook! Connect with me and submit your work on Collective World.

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