I get it, I’ve been there.
You meet a guy, whether it’s online or in person, and you think he’s a good guy. He seems nice. He seems interested in what you have to say. He seems genuine, but as time passes, your gut is telling you this guy wants one thing and one thing only: your time in bed. But you shrug it off because you think you know better.
As time passes, you realize your gut was right – this dude is a straight up f*ckboy. You end up with your heart broken into a million pieces. But you know what? You could have prevented this from happening.
So, ladies, here is my advice for you to prevent yourself from entering another unhealthy relationship.
Never settle. You should enter a relationship because you are attracted to the person, not to the idea of having a partner. Entering a relationship on the premise that you want a partner is settling. Commit yourself to a person who you are compatible with on multiple levels.
Set boundaries and never compromise them. If you are someone who needs to have your time alone to work on passion projects, that shouldn’t change when you enter a relationship with someone. You need boundaries to maintain your individuality and your sense of self.
Know what you want (and what you don’t want). There are certain values you hold close to your heart. Whatever those values are, know that you need them to exist and be respected in any relationship you have. Your values define you, so never push them aside for someone who fails to acknowledge or respect them.
Lastly, but most importantly:
Begin believing in your self-worth. Once you realize you are worthy of a healthy, passionate, loving relationship, you will attract one. If you don’t recognize and firmly believe in your self-worth, it is easy for others to walk all over you. Also, if you don’t believe you are worthy of a healthy relationship, it might be a good idea to work on yourself before committing yourself to another person.
Never doubt your value as a person. Once you begin doing so, the gates for others to do the same open. You deserve nothing but the best, so remember that whenever you’re talking to a dude who makes your stomach churn.