November 22, 2016

To The Girl He Loves Now, Be Prepared For Him To Leave

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What is the issue?
Caleb Frith
Caleb Frith

I would ask how you’ve been, but it’s early enough that I already know you’re doing amazing. That’s how it is in the beginning. You can’t believe you’ve found a man who showers you with attention and affection and it feels like you’re the luckiest girl on the planet. Your heart is bursting with happiness, yet at times you wonder if it’s all too good to be true.

At one point that girl used to be me.

Once upon a time I, too, used to bask in the glow of his adoration and melt under the gaze of his warm brown eyes, the eyes which he promised were only for me… until the day they weren’t.

On that day, the pieces of the puzzle that never added up all fell into place. It was always the same pattern: new girl appears and he is enticed by the chase, so he pursues her until he wins her over, treats her like a princess, but then gets too comfortable and decides he no longer wants her. And then the cycle begins once again. A a smart businessman doesn’t quit his job until he officially scored the new one, so the old girl is strung along wondering why he’s become so distant, until the day he isn’t even still in sight because he’s completely gone. He has the prerogative to live his life, while she’s just… stuck.

You don’t know it yet, but you’re next. One day he won’t look at you the way he used to; the daily good morning/night texts will become weekly, and his effort to keep you happy will cease to exist. He did everything in his power to earn your love, and you gave it to him—you gave it to him so purely, so deeply, and it will break you when he leaves because the love won’t just disappear: it will morph into hate. You’ll hate him with every bone in your body, but you’ll also hate yourself for somehow still loving him.

If I’ve learned anything from this relationship, it’s that if he could do it to his ex, he will do it to you, too. I used to tell myself it didn’t work out with the old girl because our relationship was more authentic, but in the end it was all in vain. Don’t be naive. Listen to your gut. If something seems too good to be true, there’s a high chance it is.

Because once he leaves, the only one you’ll have to blame is yourself. TC mark

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